friends – Kevin Trent Boswell

Your Friend Is Not Your Friend

You’ve never decided
A thing for yourself
You don’t follow through
Or stick to the course

You’ve no self-esteem
You lack the discipline
Of a well-trained dog
Or a horse

You do nothing unless
Your friend says it’s cool
And you live by their
Useless suggestion

Your mirthless friend
Is a clueless shit,
But you still never think
To question

You could break away
And leave them behind
But you know they’d mock
And shame you

So, instead, you’re unhappy,
You imprison yourself
And you let them
Control and tame you

Your failures make
Your “friend” feel better
But you think it’s wise counsel
And affection

Their “guidance” is a curse,
Guides you into the ditch,
It keeps you lonely
And lacking connection

I See You

To my friends
Who strive to be
Better than you were
Yesterday

I want you to know that
I see you

And I appreciate you

At times, I have been wrong;
Many, many, many times,
I have been
Wrong

On a few occasions, I have been the bad guy

Out of fear, I did things I wasn’t proud of;
Things I’m deeply ashamed of,
Things I hold myself accountable for,
So I don’t do them again

Sometimes, out of frustration,
I was lazy, apathetic, etc.

But I haven’t allowed myself to stay stuck,
Mired in those states indefinitely

I have not been a troll,
Picking fights for the sake of fighting

I ask myself, “Which part of my beliefs
“Are based on shoddy thinking?”

I ask myself, “In what ways have I been
“Less than kind, greedy, or negative?”

And many of you
Have been the inspirations
For my wanting to be
Better than I was

Even when I failed,
Your examples still served
As valuable anchor points
For me to get up and
Try again

I have kept a mental list
Of my friends and acquaintances
Who strive to be
Simultaneously
Excellent and kind

I want you to know that
I see you

And I appreciate you

I know you do your best
To hear both sides
Of important discussions

I know you read books and articles

I know you seek information that is
Outside of your usual echo chambers
To help you be well-informed and
As unbiased as possible

I know you become discouraged,
The same way I do,
When you see the stupid things
That people post, say, and defend

Things so easy to disprove
It’s ridiculous,
And yet, they stick to their beliefs
Like glue

I know you, too,
Throw up in your mouth a little
When people display
An unshakeable belief of,
“My feelings are just as valid as your facts.”

Feelings are a thing
They have many of,
And most of them are
Completely out of proportion
With the reality of the various situations

And facts are things that
They only have a scant few of

I know that many of you have
A vast education under your belts

Some of you are writers or educators
Some of you are scientists or musicians
Some of you are entrepreneurs
Some of you are esotericists
Or mathematicians
Or you are in mental health

Or you work in any of
Dozens of other areas that all require
Brains, determination, and a
Delicate balance of empathy and
Fearlessness

Whatever you do, I take note of how
You have an excellent understanding
Regarding your particular fields of study

Some of you have a Bachelor’s degree;
Others have a Master’s or Doctorate;
Some only have an Associate’s;
Some of you barely finished high school,
Or you got a GED,
Or you dropped out

But even those who dropped out
Have more of a
School of Hard Knocks education
Than some who have Master’s degrees

What you all have in common is that
You don’t hide behind
Your credentials

You mention them only when
It’s essential to do so

You didn’t stop learning

At no point did you decide that
You had “arrived,” or that you
Could no longer learn something
From someone half your age

At no time did you conclude that you are
Wiser, more intelligent, or more righteous
Than anyone else

Because
You aren’t competing
With anyone else;
Only with yourself

I see that quality in you

And I humbly bow
To that aspect
Of your nature

I see most people barking at each other
From places of fear, bitter hatred,
Ignorance that refuses to be corrected,
And from places of privilege;
People who cannot or will not
Show compassion for those
Who did not have the same advantages

And then, I see YOU

And the difference between
You and them is like
Night and day

You quietly go about your lives
Being friendly, but
Standing up for yourselves
And for others

More importantly,
You do it without any pretentiousness,
No “holier than thou” attitude

And I gotta say,

You fuckin’ rock.

I see you apologize
When you were rude,
Without habitually
Repeating the offense

I see you admitting when
You didn’t know something,
And graciously thanking someone for
Politely educating you about it

I also quietly assign you cool points
When some vulgar troll tries to
Rudely school you
Or assassinate your character
And you smack them down,
Put them in their place,
Without stooping
To their level

Some of you do this by
Sticking to the facts,
Some of you just block them,
And some of you utilize your
Wicked, rapier wit to
Eviscerate them

And I smile

And yes, there are many things that
I’m incorrect about,
And many of you are
Much more knowledgeable
In these areas than I am

And there are a few things
That I know more about
Than you do

But we
Give each other
Respect

Because
We both know in our hearts that
Each of us

Is sincerely trying
Much harder to

BE RIGHT

Than to merely

Appear right

I appreciate the times when you
Are patient with my stupidities,
Of which I have many

I appreciate the times
When you could have
Decimated me in an argument
Because I didn’t know
What the hell I was talking about

But you didn’t ridicule me,
You just pulled me aside and
Politely shared some
Of your wisdom with me

I see the “average” people
Who are genuinely well below
What average used to be

And they want to be rewarded
For their mediocrity

Then, I see YOU

Sharing your excellence,
Your experience, your humor,
Your charm, your skill, and your kindness

And you ask nothing
In return

I see you

And you

Keep me

Going

Get Yourself a Dog

Everything crumbles, fails and breaks
All of it in shambles, all in due time
Crushing, the endless slew of heartbreaks
Before that long nap we take in the lime

One plan works out and we give many thanks
Success, daring us to dream more grand
Shedding tears, when another one tanks,
Going not-at-all how we’d imagined or planned

Through all of the ups, downs and plateaus
At the end of each, long, tired day
There’s some place that each of us goes
Where to rest, our heads down, we do lay

Some sleep in luxury, like kings and queens
Lovers in silk sheets, fathers and mothers
With children nearby, in comfortable means
Dreaming of futures, brighter than others’

Those on whom fortune never gives a call
More than just some, a much larger number
In hovels, which are hardly homes at all
In cars, shelters or alleys, they slumber

Each type faces their own, unique struggles
Days, a mix of good and bad, one discovers
Either one goes down easier with snuggles
With a little love, one more quickly recovers

Turbulent, these unplanned ups and downs
Coming home, victorious or beaten by the fight
Smiles are always more welcome than frowns
But not everyone thinks you’re such a delight

People are critters possessed of great capacity
For cruelty, murder, greed and deceit
But a dog is a true friend and lacks the ability
To ignore you, to lie, betray or mistreat

A puppy is always ecstatic to see you
When you’re gone for minutes or many an hour
And there’s very few things one can do
To cause their opinion of their master to sour

Get yourself a dog and to it, commit
Good food and walks, like clockwork
Never hit it or neglect, the least little bit
Remember well that dogs don’t speak Jerk

Every day, that dog, you have to be earning
Their kindness, something we don’t deserve
Train yourself, lots and lots of learning
How a happy, healthy dog, to preserve

Get your lazy butt up, take it on a walk
Read everything you can find about training
Give it routine and real love, not just talk
When they misbehave, your anger, restraining

Don’t try to reason with a dog, silly human
Learn their language, don’t angrily assume…
It doesn’t speak English, you have to illumine
You have to be the adult in the room

Pay no attention when they do naughty stuff
Lavish them with praise whenever they do right
Patiently teach them, never yell or be gruff
And you’ll know in the end, it was right

Because days… you’re going to have all kinds
Tragedies and celebrations, galore
Friends come and go and lovers lose their minds
But a dog will adore you now and evermore

Where we humans go, when our lights go out
Is a thing that we hotly debate and discuss
But all dogs go to heaven, without any doubt
Because dogs are far better people than us